Today's dilemma...

I'm trying to get pictures together to fill frames to display around my place. Question of the day (I know I'm going to get a lot of grief for this one): I have a picture of me with someone that I don't particularly like that much anymore. The problem is, I look really good in the picture. Do I still put it up? And no, I'm not going to say whose picture it is. I'm not that mean. Really, I'm not.

Weekend Update

Christine's been getting on me to update my blog so here it is. I don't really have anything exciting to report and I haven't seen any stupidity that deserves comments. I bowled badly this week, I spent a lot of money on stuff for my house, and had someone come over to bake some things in my kitchen leaving me the mess to clean up. Typical week.

Today was daylight savings time here so I'll be an extra hour ahead of the US for the next week. This means that I will only be able to IM/email people for 2 hours of my work day. This is not good. DST especially sucks when you're up until 5am and realize it's actually 6am already. Oops, my bad. I guess that's what I get for finally getting a life. :) Oh, and maybe next time remember to turn the alarm ON so you wake up before 1, ass.

I've realized that Germany's weather is everything I've been told. I was supposed to go wandering around Frankfurt with some peeps until we realized it was supposed to rain all day. I'm beginning to think we should have gone anyway since I may never get to see anything if I wait until the weather is decent. Here's the forecast for this week:

Tonight: Showers
Monday: Showers
Tuesday: Showers
Wednesday: Showers
Thursday: Showers
Friday: Showers
Saturday: Scattered Showers
Sunday: Showers

Check out weather.com if you don't believe me. :)

Upon further review, I don't like any pics I currently have of my house... but here's one of some horses in my front yard near the garage where Scarlett is chillin. SWEET.

Tara: a good joke 24/7 :)

Yesterday was the ultimate slam on Tara for being single day. It felt like Valentine’s Day all over again. As if I need constant reminders to point out the obvious. I had all of my household goods delivered (one month early!!) One of the movers and the quality control guy both commented on separate occasions that I needed to get married as my place was big enough to two. Thanks for making me feel better.

The next example was not exclusive to yesterday… but it still came up. In fact, I would say I get it every day. Whenever I meet a new person, they ask me what my husband does. The first response that comes to my mind: do you think I would go anywhere without wearing the huge engagement ring that I would require to get married? Trust me, you’d know if I was married because I’d be sporting a sweet rock 24/7. When I say I’m single, they ask what I did in the military. Apparently to be a female civilian working overseas requires marriage (females obviously can’t get jobs without spousal preference) or prior military service (because who else would be crazy enough to randomly move to another country… er, except me).

When I say I have neither a hubby nor retirement pay, I get the best looks of confusion. When they find out how old I am it gets even better. They assume I’m in my 30s because of my crazy ass decision to move here and my job position. It’s fabulous. I think I might start making up some sweet stories. Examples: my first 3 marriages didn’t work out, I was supposed to be a German mail order bride but it didn't work out, I’ve had my face lifted twice and lie about my age, etc.

My visit to the Berg

My first mini roadtrip took me to Heidelberg, which is where I had been hoping to move in the first place. :) I was there to see a battle of the bands, but also got to do some shopping and sightseeing. By sightseeing I mean I saw the castle from afar and moved on to the stores. Big shock: it was raining most of the day like it has been about 80% of the time I've been here. :)

Not that I didn't notice this before, but shopping help me truly realize that I need to drop about 25 pounds if I'm going to fit in with these mega skinny European chicks. We'll see if I have the motivation to make this happen. HA



I added this picture for Lisa and Amie, my token Catholic friends. The statue is of Catholics putting down some protestants years and years ago. I don't remember why, but that's probably not much of a surprise.

Dem lites r purdy

Germans don't mess around. Why only have yellow lights when preparing to stop? Why not throw a yellow in there so you can rev up to go? I think I like this place. :)

More fragmented random thoughts that aren't funny.

Wow, didn't realize I was going to be judged for saying I prefer the officers... :)

Did everyone have a happy Harry Potter Day yesterday? I'm sad to report that the PX only had the regular version. I'm sad I won't be able to see the deleted scenes, but I'm sure they'll be on the internet shortly. I should be more than happy with what I've got since it's not out in Germany for another month.

I picked up my car today. Naturally it started snowing as soon as I started to leave for the 50 mile trip back to Hanau. (When I say snow I mean flurries--nothing that would stop me from driving at the crazy speeds I'm about to describe.) I was appreciating Scarlett until we hopped on the autobahn and I started to wonder what I was thinking in wanting to drive here. I was following someone and would have been majorly lost had I not kept up. I think he forgot that I was following him. I don't have a cell phone yet (see paragraph below) so it could have been very very very very bad. It's definitely not something that will become habit for me, though I'd be lying if I said it wasn't going to be great to cruise at 80.

Observations I made about how to know you're going way too fast on the autobahn:
1. You're in the far left passing lane and you're speeding by all the other drivers who are also traveling at a crazy fast speed.
2. You're 10 MPH from topping off your speedometer.

Phones: They do phones much differently here than in the US. The phones are much more advanced, but calling is more expensive (not a shock, really). All incoming calls are free, but you pay for all outgoing calls. Calling cell phones is very expensive however you do it. Calling from one cell company to another costs about $.75/min so you'd better make sure you know your friends. Too many rules for me not to be confused. I have to decide if I want to get a 2-year contract (which there is no way to break) or prepaid (where I have to regulate how much I talk). We all know how hooked I was to my cell phone in the states. I didn't even have a landline, but I have to get one here for my DSL (which costs $200 to set up!) :) I feel as if I've lost my best friend. At least I can send cheap international text messages. :)

I'm also not feeling good about my chances of getting World Cup tickets... but I'm going to keep trying. Even people that live around here can't get them.

More shocking news: I might start working out with some peeps from work... things that aren't sports that I like to play... things like... STEP AEROBICS. What's wrong with me? I also bowl every week with a group of fun peeps. The Dude would be proud.

A hobo no longer...

Slowing but surely I’m getting caught up with this lovely blog (primarily because I know Kim is waiting for it). Today was a big day:

1) I found out that Scarlett has arrived in Wiesbaden and is ready for me to pick up! I just need to get insurance/temporary plates and a ride there and I’ll be set. Had I known she’d get here 10 days early, I would have been a little more on the ball.

2) I found a place to live and it’s awesome. It includes a lot of American stuff that doesn’t usually come with rentals like light fixtures and a full kitchen. It also has a satellite dish (once I get a decoder), a garage, and two bathrooms with a bath AND shower. The best part: it has 4 bedrooms (one for me, a closet, a guest room, and perhaps a study/den). That means everyone can come visit! Can you tell I’m excited?

Now that my stress has diminished for my car and housing, it’s time for my thoughts on why I will never find a good Army boy. Be prepared for some deep thinking… It’s already established that I’m a snob: meaning I will never go for anyone enlisted when I can get an officer. I’m the same way with beer: why drink Miller Light when Sam Adams is that much better. No contest. That knocks out approximately 90% of army right there. (All of my numbers are likely to be high: I’m trying to be optimistic here. Don’t rain on my parade.) That means for the rest of this discussion we’ll be working off a base number of 10%.

Of this percentage, let’s figure that a bunch of them are not in my age bracket. We’ll be conservative and say 4%. Apparently at this point my standards aren’t too strict as far as age goes. Anyways, we’re down to 6%. Of this, at least half are likely to already be married. Down to 3%.

Part of the problem with trying to find an officer is they are about 88.7% more likely to be a complete ass. (I was going to throw some standard deviations in there, but to be honest I’m a little tired today.) The few that I’ve seen around here (married, fortunately part of the formula that’s already gone): dicks. The odds of me finding an officer who doesn’t take himself too seriously: down to about .34% and I’ll bet he’s in Iraq.

These findings are not based on an actual, legitimate study. Margin of error +/- 8%.

Is it really going to be that hard to find a good drinking buddy or two? I mean honestly... Though apparently the specialists love me. Can we say GATOR alert? :)

Snow!!

I wish I knew where to ski around here because it's snowing like crazy! I was in German Headstart this week and I've already been asked twice if this is my playground in the pic below. :) No, it's not--but I might play on it if I get bored enough this weekend. Right now my only plans involve seeing how long it takes me to polish off a bag of Reese's Pieces. I love the snow... until I remember that I have to walk to get anywhere until I get my car next week. Everyone seems to think it's already here, but the base where I need to pick it up closed at 10am this morning because of the snow. Just my luck. :)


More recent news: Today I passed my driver's test on the first try so I'm now an officially licensed driver (once I have a car, of course). Clear the road peeps, it's time to roll... :) I need to find a place that has curling.

German Beer: Nectar of the Gods

I had my first German beer at lunch today. I don’t think I’ll require water anymore, thank you very much.

It will come as no surprise to most of you that 45 minutes of shopping downtown resulted in the purchase of a new pair of snowpants and several chocolate bars. I would have dropped another 200 euros had I had time to do more than window-shopping at the department store. I am going to get into soooooo much trouble down there. I haven’t even seen Ikea yet! Sad news: I’ve heard there’s a Super Walmart down the street from Ikea. I thought I was going to get away from that sort of thing, ick.

Just a little advice for you kiddies out there: it’s not a good idea to try to learn two languages at once. Obviously I’m trying to learn some German, but I thought it would be fun to brush up on my French. What can I say: reading Harry Potter À L’École Des Sorciers is a very entertaining way to practice French. English doesn’t have cool words like Soufpouffle to amuse me. Pretty soon I think I might be speaking my own little language. I think I’ll call is Frengleutsch or Engdeucais.

Curling – this is quite possibly my favorite sport now. Here is a brief synopsis for those who aren’t familiar with it: you shove a rock down a sheet of ice aiming to be the closest to a target while using little brooms to guide the rock’s speed. Best. Sport. Ever. Not really, but it’s funny to watch guys sliding down ice chasing after a rock with some brooms. Plus, let’s face it: it’s probably the easiest sport to get onto the US Olympic team. If I get three volunteers, we’ll go ahead and try to make it to Vancouver. HA.

The army boy/office discussion will have to wait until another day. I'm tired from all this walking and schnitzel. :)

Welcome to Germany...

My first thoughts on arriving in Germany (remember, I was sleep deprived at the time): Are those people smoking in the airport!? And did that dog just pee right in front of the baggage claim?!

WARNING: These paragraphs are in no way tied together. Read at your own literary peril.

In response to certain other blogs: no, I'm not dead. I just haven'’t had a chance to crank out a quality blog since my arrival in Germany. Who knew they had Internet here? j/k (Author's note: this remark was written before I was unable to get on the web for two days. Ah, the irony.) I knew that once the Olympics were over I'd have plenty of time to dedicate to blogging, so why peak too soon? I'm sure the European Olympics experience will make it into a blog if I don’t get too lazy. It's not like I have a lot going on at the moment. No car, possessions, friends, or cell phone make Tara a lame girl! (But only briefly until I get my car and hooker out a lil bit.) :)

Have I mentioned how much I miss Scarlett? Not that I would be able to drive her anyway. I'm currently not licensed to operate a motorized vehicle here. It'’s probably better that way. I can't wait until I can tell my mom that I hit 125 on the autobahn. When she wakes up from passing out, I will then inform her that it'’s 125 kph, which is only around 75 mph. I'’m sure that's going to be a good joke. One that I will use at least 15 times more than is reasonable.

Lisa and Christine: I sincerely apologize for my lack of memory. Your list of stupid things that you relate to me is truly impressive. I don’t think I could come up with such an accurate list. I’ll go ahead and blame the alcohol. (Not that I‚’ve ever had any of that, Mom.) I would, however, love to elaborate on each of your examples. I feel that many of them deserve a rebuttal from me, but let‚’s face it: I‚’m too lazy and most of those stories should not be revealed to the public (like what I did my last night in the States, thank you Trisha.) :)

I‚’ve been asked four times already if I know what my last name means in German. Despite what Lisa‚ may tell you, it‚’s not ‚‘whore‚’. I had thought cabbage was accurate enough until someone gave me the real description. I have real pride in my Wirsing ancestors who thought it was a good idea to name themselves after ‚“a dish of cabbage from Bavaria that looks like grass clippings and tastes like shit‚” when THEY COULD HAVE MADE UP ANYTHING WHEN THEY HOPPED OFF THE BOAT!! Wha?! But really I‚’ve heard it‚’s a delicacy in Bavaria. This is just like someone leaving Alabama with the name Grits. Maybe getting married isn‚’t a bad idea just to change my name. It‚’s just a thought. ;) Or I could have my name legally changed to Maxine 'Max' Power.

I don’t really feel like I‚’ve left… Perhaps it‚’s all the Americans running around or the lack of a tourist passport. I‚’m not quite sure. And if I don‚’t get more comments on this post than the Harry Potter blog, I‚’m quitting altogether. :)

On the next Tara Takes Europe, I‚’ll discuss my office (and its lack of flair), curling, and theories on why I‚’ll never be able to catch a good army boy.